It's the start of the school year and our little guy is so excited to ride the big yellow school bus to Kindergarten! Off he goes and I sit buy and cry! I can't believe he's grown so fast...where did the past 4 years go? In my mind, it was just like it was last week when we were in Russia.
From the very start, I started receiving phone calls and visiting with his teacher about her concerns. She was seeing significant behaviors that had begun to affect the classroom. Here's what was going with Jackson: difficulty sitting in the bus and not standing on the seat; not able to be redirected when they asked him to stop doing something (like kicking the seat); not sitting in the circle; kicking chairs; head banging and head butting the teacher; swearing; full-out temper tantrums; angry voice; striking out at peers; refusing to write; etc. I remember sitting in our first SAT school meeting in mid-September and was heartbroken. Here was my son - the child who has overcome so much in his short life - being, again described as a monster. We were not seeing behaviors of this magnitude at home nor at day care. So, suddenly, I began realizing that the school environment was triggering something for him - look at preschool and now Kindergarten. Again, diagnoses were thrown out: autism, attachment disorder, ADD, etc.
So, as a parent of the only internationally adopted child within our district at this time, it became my crusade to educate myself. Over the next few weeks, I've done so much research on orphans who spent time in orphanages and the impact that has had in their transition to school.
As time goes by, I'll update you on what has worked, what hasn't, and resources that we have found helpful.
Showing posts with label behaviors. Show all posts
Showing posts with label behaviors. Show all posts
Friday, October 10, 2008
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Realizing Something Wasn't Quite Right
The next several years went by so quickly....Jackson went from not
speaking at all to being our little social butterfly! He's gone from
not attaching to any particular "toy" to his favoriteflinstone toy car
(or at least that's what we call it!). He shows a lot of emotion and is
the most loving little boy we've ever met...okay, we're biased!
A year ago, we decided to remove him from his in-home daycare to start a
full-time preschool in a larger city where we live. I remember being so
scared taking him there. The teacher probably thought I was a paranoid
mother as I spent a lot of time educating her and the director about
Jackson's background. I also pointed out that developmentally he was
behind his peers - and that was okay with us. Again, we stressed that
you could not compare him to his peers - he didn't have the same
upbringing. After all, he was institutionalized until age 2.
At first, I heard the greatest reports from the teacher when I would pick
him up. While he didn't have an interest in writing anything, he was
learning his ABC's and could recognize his name within only a few short
months...we were thrilled!!!! Then, the call came. I'll never forget
it. The Director of the Preschool had concerns about our son - he
wasn't standing in line, he would throw temper tantrums, kick chairs,
scream, say naughty words, and bang his head against the floor or wall.
While we had seen these behaviors at home, they were infrequent and
very manageable. In fact, I remember describing them to the preschool
teacher as behaviors of a 2 or 3 year old who doesn't get their way.
After all, Jackson was only 4 and so, because of his delays, he was
behaving like a 2 or 3 year old.
Things continued to get worse in the school setting. We took him to both our family practice docto
and pediatrician - both who said that there was nothing medically wrong with him that would cause him to act out. The pediatrician recommended a psychiatrist. Now, with all due respect and probably a part of our journey, I wasn't ready to see a psychiatrist who may spend an hour
with my son and prescribe a pill. I spent weeks researching regional specialists who may spend time treating children who were adopted from overseas. But, no luck. So, after a few more months, we removed him from preschool and placed him into another in-home daycare.
Time passed and we would ask the daycare provider if she was seeing the same
signs that the preschool reported. She mentioned thatoccassionally, Jackson would have "bad days" - like other children and they would consist of the temper tantrums, bad words, etc. But, then either with redirection, time out or ignoring the behavior, he would settle down.
So, here we were...parents who wanted so desparately to help our youngest son, but yet were confused as we didn't see the same magnitude of behaviors the preschool saw. In all honesty, we just blamed it onoverstimulation in the classroom and too many children. We would wait until fall to see how he responded to kindergarten - which consisted of a much smaller class size than his preschool.
speaking at all to being our little social butterfly! He's gone from
not attaching to any particular "toy" to his favoriteflinstone toy car
(or at least that's what we call it!). He shows a lot of emotion and is
the most loving little boy we've ever met...okay, we're biased!
A year ago, we decided to remove him from his in-home daycare to start a
full-time preschool in a larger city where we live. I remember being so
scared taking him there. The teacher probably thought I was a paranoid
mother as I spent a lot of time educating her and the director about
Jackson's background. I also pointed out that developmentally he was
behind his peers - and that was okay with us. Again, we stressed that
you could not compare him to his peers - he didn't have the same
upbringing. After all, he was institutionalized until age 2.
At first, I heard the greatest reports from the teacher when I would pick
him up. While he didn't have an interest in writing anything, he was
learning his ABC's and could recognize his name within only a few short
months...we were thrilled!!!! Then, the call came. I'll never forget
it. The Director of the Preschool had concerns about our son - he
wasn't standing in line, he would throw temper tantrums, kick chairs,
scream, say naughty words, and bang his head against the floor or wall.
While we had seen these behaviors at home, they were infrequent and
very manageable. In fact, I remember describing them to the preschool
teacher as behaviors of a 2 or 3 year old who doesn't get their way.
After all, Jackson was only 4 and so, because of his delays, he was
behaving like a 2 or 3 year old.
Things continued to get worse in the school setting. We took him to both our family practice docto
and pediatrician - both who said that there was nothing medically wrong with him that would cause him to act out. The pediatrician recommended a psychiatrist. Now, with all due respect and probably a part of our journey, I wasn't ready to see a psychiatrist who may spend an hour
with my son and prescribe a pill. I spent weeks researching regional specialists who may spend time treating children who were adopted from overseas. But, no luck. So, after a few more months, we removed him from preschool and placed him into another in-home daycare.
Time passed and we would ask the daycare provider if she was seeing the same
signs that the preschool reported. She mentioned thatoccassionally, Jackson would have "bad days" - like other children and they would consist of the temper tantrums, bad words, etc. But, then either with redirection, time out or ignoring the behavior, he would settle down.
So, here we were...parents who wanted so desparately to help our youngest son, but yet were confused as we didn't see the same magnitude of behaviors the preschool saw. In all honesty, we just blamed it onoverstimulation in the classroom and too many children. We would wait until fall to see how he responded to kindergarten - which consisted of a much smaller class size than his preschool.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)